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Billy's Big Empty

from Losing Time by Just Dandy

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lyrics

Story:

Charlie’s lives with his sister, Billy.
Billy couldn’t move on.
Billy’s wife, Beth, died in a car accident years ago, and she had lived with Charlie ever since. After the funeral Billy couldn’t work because she would stay in bed for days at a time. She’d forget to eat. She’d forget her therapy appointments. She developed some serious drug and alcohol problems. She basically became incapable of taking care of herself, so Charlie took her in.
She keeps her cabin pitch black. Every night she dreams of Beth. Every morning, In that darkness, she forgets that she is gone. It’s worth the crushing dread that follows when she rolls over and realizes that she is alone. It’s worth a lifetime of pain for a second of believing she’s alive.
The fact that the world is ending doesn’t mean much to Billy. For her, the world ended years ago.


Lyrics:

And then I woke up with a smile on my face until the light adjusted and I saw this flat place. The relics of my life yet to be takes hold of my head as it shreds my memory. And so I go through life always waiting, collecting lies to store away to use later as I'm constantly reminded how I couldn't save her. It's almost seasonal, this feeling. Happy Halloween and I'm stuck in your scene.

But I always wake up with a smile, in the darkness I pretend it never ends, in the darkness we grew, and drove,
and lived, and died, and wondered what life could be if that one day had gone a slightly different way.
But in the dark she wasn't in pain, in the dark we were safe and sane, in the dark I never found her lying on the worlds dark floor, but darkness is an open door.

And so I drown myself in vices and really nothing could be better. Drown and smoke and smoke out my sorrow as I once again fail to forget her ...Seasonal, this feeling.... happy Halloween and I'm stuck in your scene.

And here and now locked in my moss covered cabin where I'll stay and pray for something better, but the cold keeps coming fast and bitter and I'm always dreaming, trying to get her.

Charlie:
My sister Billy's big empty, breathing in her memory. Sister Billy's big empty. Not much left of her to see. And the only reason you love me is because I haven't found the time to wake up.

Billy:
And yeah the only reason you're with me is because I haven't found the time to wake up. It is coming now, we all can see. The end of us, humanity. It is coming now the real big empty. This apocalypse we lived to see. And though for me the end is a memory, it's official now, this world’s gonna catch up with me.

credits

from Losing Time, released June 11, 2018

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